High as a kite

I honestly thought the hormonal roller coaster that started with pregnancy ENDED when the baby was born.  Surprise!  It so doesn't.  Apparently this whole breastfeeding thing keeps your hormones locked and loaded which would explain why I am STILL sobbing at the Sarah McLachlan save the animals ASPCA commercial.  You know the one, the sad puppy eyes staring at you through the cages, the little kitty faces all pathetically looking at the camera, her melancholy angel song running through the background.  Bah on you Sarah McLachlan, bah on you!  

Oh!  And let's not forget ANY television show that deals with a child being injured, ill, or, god forbid, DYING.  I'm looking at YOU Private Practice and Dr. Addison Montgomery (that is such a soap opera name, no?).  And it seems that late at night, I end up reading blogs and posts about parents who have lost a child or a child that has lost a parent and AHHHHHHH!  How I find these, and why only in the darkest hours of the day, I cannot explain.  That's when Tim has to hold me back from scooping up my sleeping baby and promising him I will keep him safe forever and ever, amen.  End result is waking the baby and causing myself more tears and it seems I have a problem with wanting to snuggle my child WHEN HE IS SLEEPING.  I hope he doesn't mind if I do that when he's a teenager.  

I hope I get better and soon.  This up and down, in and out is driving me insane.  Literally.