I blame each and every one of you with a child older than 16 months for not telling me. For not telling me that my dear, beloved, mild tempered child was going to turn into a whining, pinching, throwing, leech-like creature in his 16th month. It's all your fault and you ARE going to share blame with me for his bad behavior. Not only is he cantankerous, he's also deliberate in his evil ways. He looks me square in the eye before he throws his sippy cup halfway across the kitchen. He makes sure I'm paying attention before he attempts to throw himself off the couch onto the coffee table. His methods are sure and fast and he knows he'll get maximum response the more dangerous the behavior. He's shifty. He's rascally. He's a...toddler. And it's all your fault for not warning me.
Also, as evidenced by the following video, he's easily suggestible. Keep in mind, he did NOT fall down nor did he hit his head. I can totally use this to my benefit, no?