He may still be a baby, but he wants to be a big boy so badly. There is no time for cuddling anymore...he refuses to let me rock him to sleep and protests with his lungs and his arms and his feet when I try. And I try every night, hoping that he will once again curl up on my chest. And every night I give up and put him to sleep in his crib, to cry out his frustrations and fall asleep alone. As he likes it. And every night I spend a little time outside his door, listening to him sigh in his sleep, rustle and kick off his blanket. He's growing up so fast. I say that everyday. I wish I could stop time so I could have him as he is right now, forever. My sweet, sweet boy. My boy, always with his fingers in his mouth.